to everything

12 Sep

Posted by: Lizzie

The seasons are changing again and we are making adjustments again. From births to weddings to everything else, we’re in a constant state of renewal. And as more and more changes around me, I find we’re sending our roots deeper into the ground.

I’m delighting in the fact that I can expect my moonflowers to grow back in the summer. When I come home in the evenings from soccer or choir, they are open and fragrant in the moonlight.

Ugh. I won’t get cheesy…

The other day, we got our copy of Roots, Shoots, Buckets, and Boots. Jamie’s job in the next couple weeks is to build me a potato box, and in the Spring, we plan to start the moon garden. We’ll probably plant some pumpkins, gourds, and corn, too, but that all depends on how much work the moon garden is going to take. At least we already have seeds and can sprout moonflower seedlings before everything else!

We’re already looking ahead to the holidays and have just about finished shopping for the boys. Aiden is getting an entire kitchen set to go with his play food. We’re wrapping all the accessories separately so he’ll have a lot to open. For Corey, we’re getting him the Plantarium* from Oompa Toys. We also considered getting him the Garden Tools Tote but after writing to the manufacturer, we discovered that most of the toys are from China & elsewhere, certainly not fair trade. Make that a lesson, I guess, that even if you buy toys from an online store that sells fair trade & organic toys, they may also sell some that aren’t.

Simon’s entering a new phase of toddlerhood that involves a lot of screaming when things don’t go his way. I’m limiting my interventions to issues of safety, but even then, his strong desire to climb kitchen tables and the like make it difficult to avoid several meltdowns a day. With the older boys, lessons I’m learning from The Explosive Child are making it easier for us to communicate effectively. I’ve always heard “pick your battles” but that’s always easier said than done. Aiden is prone to fits of rage over little things like dropping his fork or spilling his milk at dinner. My problem is keeping cool during all of this and allowing him to express himself without just telling him to “stop whining” or something similar. I’m glad he’s able to say, “I’M ANGRY!” whenever it happens, so I hope that this will eventually lead to him to express more of his anger verbally instead of trying to hit me or whoever else is around when meltdowns are inevitable.

Corey is having trouble thinking through problems in a logical way, but we’re making headway when I meet him in the middle of things. For example, he wanted to read in bed last night but couldn’t find the part of his flashlight that holds the battery compartment inside. I was getting frustrated because I wanted him to be in bed and he was on the verge of a meltdown over not finding the part. After he wandered aimlessly around the house “looking” for it for a few minutes, I told him he had five minutes to find it and then he was going to bed. He (of course) didn’t like that idea, but instead of insisting like I usually do, I offered him the opportunity to tell me what he thought. He said that he wanted to look for eight minutes and I agreed. After three minutes of looking, he decided that he would go to bed without it and that was that. MELTDOWN AVERTED!

This doesn’t mean that I’m completely yelling-free, but I’m adding parenting skills to my repertoire that I’m quite proud of. Everyone in the house is a little happier because of it, too.

*We realized, after placing the order, that the Plantarium was made in Japan. We haven’t investigated the company further, but this year’s holiday shopping has at least made us more mindful of where we purchase our gifts in the future.

Tags: parenting